busy

the summer is almost over and the last few sunny days are flashing by. it's been about a month of school so far and i feel slightly overwhelmed. so much is happening and i assumed that i'd be able to charge full speed ahead without taking time to breathe. i thought that i could be in class all day, be at work all evening and see the Boy every few days and this would all wash over me in a glaze of everyday "normalcy." but i am starting to fizzle. maybe even burn out a little. i took today off of school as a mental health day. i slept the morning away, took a long bath, and i am going to go on a lazy walk in the sunshine, take some pictures, and later make a gift for a friend. i know that homework and responsibility is waiting for me, but my brain is throbbing, metaphorically. i can't forget that i need alone time and being at school with people all day and at work with people all night does not effect me. i always do this to myself. i think that i can just pack my life full and ignore the things that make me, me. like being alone while reading or listening to music or writing or doodling. i used to do this in high school. i would go a week or two in constant motion between school, friends, activities, homework. then i would collapse. i still do this to myself. i guess there are just some things about yourself you can't change. at least not overnight. and i'm still not the most social person anyway, but interacting with people in stressful situations makes hanging out with friends in non-stressful situations a little more draining than it should be.

but life is good right now. i am moving forward even if it feels slow and scary. this saturday i am doing my first real-life interpreting. every year the public speaking class does speeches at the zoo and the second year interpreting students interpret for them. it's not for a grade and the only deaf people who will be there are our teachers, but it's exposure and experience--and i am terrified. i have to do some prep work this week: the animals i got paired with are the elephant and the emu. i hope that the students i got paired with are slow and calm speakers, but i doubt it. we're only a month into school and i remember where i was at that point when i took public speaking. either way, it's a free day at the zoo and the Boy might come. i'll finally be getting my hands up outside of the classroom and at least i won't be graded on it.

now if you'll excuse me friends, i have some frolicking to do.